Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Severing the Ties

Well, it is official. Marco is no longer breastfeeding. This was not a voluntary act on his part. It has now been a week and I will fill you in on the details. The World Health Organization says you should breastfeed for two years, so I feel a tiny bit guilty about cutting him off already, but it really is only a tiny bit.

Prior to Marco being able to climb out of his crib, he basically nursed three times a day. When he woke up, before nap and before bed. After he was able to climb out of his crib and started sleeping in a bed, he would come to our room around 3am and want to nurse. And then again around 5am and again at 7am. Well, I found this rather annoying, so decided to cut out the morning nursing all together. This didn't go over well at first, but after a few days he accepted it.

Now fast forward about a month, naps are not going well. He basically would only nap if he nursed to sleep and it was almost impossible to detach myself. If I did it too early, he would wake up screaming and rarely would go back to sleep. I was almost stuck there the whole nap. This was not working for me. Oh, the other thing is as soon as I got home from work, he would claim he would want to go to bed, but he really just wanted to nurse. Sometimes he would not sleep at all, he would nurse, then get up to play, then want to nurse and go to sleep a half hour later. Night was fine, he would nurse for a few minutes and then lay down and go to sleep. The other thing he started doing is shoving his hand down my shirt. Even though he knows he only got to nurse before nap and bedtime, he still would ask to nurse all the time. This kid would nurse every ten minutes if he was allowed.

Anyway, last Tuesday he did one of his nurse for a bit, then get up and play deals, so I decided then and there, this is it! That night I didn't nurse him and it wasn't that bad. I think this is because for a while we weren't nursing before bed and it has been a very long time since he has nursed to sleep at night. Wednesday last week, Alessandro took him to the park and he fell asleep in the car on the way home, so no real fireworks there. Wednesday night was a little more difficult. This was the first time ever Marco didn't get to nurse for an entire day. The real test came on Thursday nap time. I think this is when he realized this is for real. He screamed for 30 straight minutes. He was so angry at me. I was laying in his bed with him and he was pulling at my face, pushing me, tearing at my shirt, but he never did leave the bed. At some point Alessandro came in and Marco reached for him and let him comfort him for a bit. I think he was saying something like "Save me from this awful woman." After 30 minutes of crying, he finally stopped and fell asleep 5 minutes later. That to me is called success!

As I said, now it has been a week. Today he was angry at his nap again, cried and tantrumed in bed for a good 30 minutes and finally fell asleep. He only slept for 30 minutes (grrrr) and woke up a total pain in the ass. Tonight he was totally fine with going to bed, but it took forever! I was in there with him for more than an hour. He keeps his eyes open and his hand on my shoulder. I think he is just wary that I am going to try to escape the second he closes his eyes (which is true!).

The other thing I have been doing is trying to get him to have a security item. Heather gave him a Blue's Clues puppy for Christmas and I have been getting him attached to this. Every time before we go to sleep, I say I need to sleep with Blue or ask where is Blue and he gets her. Tonight I asked him if he wanted to hold Blue and he said ok, and he is still holding her. I want something other than me that will provide him some comfort!

Anyway, the naps are still not going well, but eventually I am sure he will nap without screaming at me.

One other thing I wanted to mention is that I owe a huge thank you to Lisa (Jordan's mom). Marco hates brushing his teeth. I literally have to sit on him and force his mouth open. His pediatrician suggested that I be firm and that eventually he would understand that this is happening with or with out his cooperation, so he would eventually cooperate. Well, it has been 3 months of being firm and he is not cooperating. Lisa told me to try an electric toothbrush. It is like magic. He now actually seems to enjoy brushing his teeth!


Nicole said...

I have no idea what this must feel like but I am sorry. It hurts me to read this...I know it has to happen yet it is still painful. I love you and it will be okay! I can find a stuffed trojan horse that Marco can use for a security blanket. ;-)

Mom said...

A picture just for you